The world online

If you had said to me last year that most my clinic will be online via zoom , I would have shrugged my shoulders and shook my head in disbelief .
What a difference a year makes .
A year ago , I was a basic “ zoomer “ very rarely engaging with the world online as I’m pretty old skool .
It’s within my fabric to still smile at passers by and offer them a “ good morning “ as we walk into our day .
I live and breathe for connection , for that beautiful transaction of humanity . Honestly speaking I did not know much of the “ robotic world “ .
I had no interest at school in my ICT sessions , I simply would switch of the computer to the dismay of my teacher , followed by the clicking of my pen as I scribbled poetry and scripts of strangers , even then I was fascinated with relations and how “ togetherness “ worked .
It was only at the mad rush from the world that I became more interested …. I had to be .
The world was racing into the future one day at a time , with algorithms, social media platforms , big tech giants , relationships and humanity had added another level to the playing field .
If I wanted to connect , I had to get “ savvy “. This was no easy job ; my mind wanted to refuse this interaction . I wanted to be outside , engaging , talking , being .
As the years passed , fb , Google became another way of being , almost innate , like it’s always been here and sometimes you will catch me – still rebuking it.
Fast forward however to 2020 . Where relations – connections almost seemed to evaporate.
This was torture for me .
Now just to clarify , I am not popular , I haven’t got a bunch of “ Mates “ that I call upon etc . I am in fact a bit of a loner and introverted . But it was last year that I realised something .
I needed the “ hello how are you ?” , at the tesco checkout , I needed to give my little wave to the old folk who sit by the window having their morning cuppa , I needed the sound of busy on the school walk and I guess the rhythm of the hustle and bustle that life brings .
Without this , it was quiet too quiet and acquired me to dig a bit deeper into my suitcase of strength , to breathe and take one day at a time .
I didn’t like it . Nor did my clients .
All of a sudden we were propelled into a way of being we never had to do.
We had to walk the walk , without knowing where we were going or even how to get there .
I never thought I would give my gratitude to zoom .
Soon into the lockdown I began “ zooming “ I had dabbled in it before but most my clients were face to face . So the work load, zoom fatigue and learning curves were ready to pounce .
I learned so much last year with clients , as they did too . A different way of connecting , one that suited them and suited me .
I was happy to “ see “ them , be present with them and connect with them .
A new dimension that still offered them their safe space , their work and their healing – growth .
Don’t get me wrong , signal issues , tech issues : a laptop that decides to reboot and update was not fun but like any relationship , we work through those little “ niggles “ and relational depth is occurred even within the ruptures and the stressors of zoom.
It has opened my eyes to the world online , it’s so much more than scrolling through posts , it’s a world where you find like minded souls , kindred spirits .
It’s a world where you can heal and learn and connect .
It’s a world you can imprint and ironically find your place within it.
My 16 year old self is apologising to the world online , to the teacher who would always be scratching their head and trying to motivate me as I chewed on my pen .
I see now that in a world where we could not connect where humanity seemed to cease …….
It continued – lived on ONLINE .
This was many peoples saviour last year as it was mine . It continues to be a platform I now use more than most . A platform that allows flexibility , safety and all walks of life to connect from anywhere in the world . Therapy therefore has moved forward into the online world and is just as effective , humbling , beautiful and again encourages healing which last year we all needed so much off,
For that Zoom I’ll be forever grateful .

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